Raise your hand if you’ve ever woken up with a racing heart and 78 things you need to get done, only to end the day buried in half-started tasks, feeling even more anxious than when you began. I know it's not just me.
Welcome to the “ADHD Dread” party—where the drinks are topped with guilt, the music is a chaotic to-do list on loop, and the host keeps whispering, “You should be doing more!”
I’ve been there too. As someone with ADHD, I know the hamster wheel of anxious thoughts all too well. Good news: I’m not here to give you some cookie-cutter “just calm down” lecture. I’m here to share the no-BS strategies that truly help ADHD brains break the stress cycle and lower anxiety—without forcing you into systems that were never designed for you.
Yes, you will still have to use them. I know sometimes that can be really hard for you. Stick around until the end and we will go over some strategies to help you boost your chances of actually using any of these tips.
1. Why ADHD and Anxiety Are Basically Frenemies
ADHD is like having 25 browser tabs open in your mind at all times, and anxiety is that pop-up video you can’t pause blaring at some ridiculous volume in your earbuds suddenly. They feed off each other. When your ADHD ramps up (like avoiding a big work project till the last minute), anxiety swoops in and the doubtful gremlin who lives in your brain starts screaming, “You’re failing! You’ll never catch up!”
I promise shaming yourself is never going to help lower your anxiety levels, but neuroscience does tell us what can.
Understanding that ADHD+Anxiety is a double whammy helps you target the real problem—your brain’s struggle to start, plan, and follow through, plus the panic that sets in when you haven’t been able to yet.
2. Start With Tiny Micro-Wins
Telling an anxious ADHD brain to “just meditate for 30 minutes” can feel like telling a caffeinated toddler to sit quietly during a meeting - not happening.
Start super small instead—when you notice your stress levels creeping up, or you are getting started on a task, make that the time you take a deep breath all the way into your belly, and as slowly as humanly possible exhale for as long as you can. The longer and slower your exhale, the faster your blood chemistry shifts to kick on your parasympathetic nervous system to calm you down in a way that WORKS.
You can also choose a habit you know you do a lot throughout your day and add your mini breathing practice onto that. This is called habit stacking and it can help some of us get started on new habits with less struggle. Say every time you go to the bathroom you will do some deep breathing, or perhaps every time you go into a meeting, or every time you brush your teeth, right after you will do 3 deep breaths.
Put a post it note or visual reminder in your workspace to take deep breaths every time you open your email (yikes).
Truth be told, I love a long meditation. My brain does not always work well with silent seated meditation, even as someone with 20 years of practice. It doesn’t always feel helpful to me to know I will do a long meditation later. Sometimes, my anxiety alarm bells go off at full volume and I need something I can do in less than 3 minutes that will shift something in my body. I have a library of tiny resets I can use to get my nervous system the support it needs for me to get my ability to focus back on track after a stressful blip in my day.
Pick one micro-win—like “do a quick 60-second breathing reset” or “write down one gratitude bullet” before you open your email. Sounds tiny, but tiny is do-able. And do-able breaks the anxiety cycle. The easier it seems, the more likely you are to stick with it. Stop setting goals you know are way outside of your comfort zone. Give yourself something you can’t possibly fail at so you can build from there.
3. Cognitive Shifts: Talk Back to Your Anxiety Gremlin
Your anxious brain lies to you—telling you you’re always behind, that you’ll never finish, and you’re probably a failure for even trying. But guess what? You get to talk back. Don’t you dare let it have the last word.
Google did a study showing that psychological safety on work teams drove creativity and innovation. This means people with managers who allowed them to make mistakes, mess up, try and fail without ridicule were way more likely to come up with creative ideas and innovative solutions no one else had done before.
Your job is to create that psychological safety for yourself. And I know most ADHD adults don’t have that with themselves. It’s hard after a lifetime of being told to just do things differently, why do you have to make things so hard on yourself, and whatever other ableist nonsense has been thrown at you over the years.
You are responsible for cleaning up and working on your thinking! Treat yourself like you’d treat a close friend. Talk to yourself and give yourself the reassurance and encouragement that you need to do hard things! Picking what helpful reminder you want to give yourself when your inner bully shows up ahead of time makes you way more likely to use it and have it feel helpful. So right now, write a note to yourself or send yourself a text with the reassuring, encouraging reminder you will believe next time your anxiety gremlin is telling you you’re failng. (You’re not.)
When anxious thoughts pop up (“I’m so behind on everything!”), ask, “Is that 100% true?” Just questioning the absolute nature of anxiety helps quiet it.
Jot anxious thoughts on a notepad or phone note. Underneath, write your rational reply. By anchoring yourself in reality, you reduce the “all doom, no hope” spiral.
If your anxiety is heaping unrealistic, inhumane expectations on you (like the fact you think you’re supposed to be able to hyperfocus 100% of the time), try reminding yourself it is ok to be human. All humans have fluctuating capacity levels. You can remind yourself you are trying and that when you put effort into getting better and building skills, you will see improvement.
4. Use the “Unschedule” Method
Traditional time-blocking can be jail for ADHD brains: you set rigid blocks, your list may have been a tad unrealistic for a non-super hero, life happens, and you panic because you’re “off schedule.” Try unscheduling: plan your breaks, rewards, celebrations, rest, and flex-time first, then fit tasks around them.
Once I started scheduling “fun breaks” as legit blocks in my calendar, I felt less rebellious. It was easier for me to sit at the computer for focus blocks and longer stretches knowing I would be getting a movement break in the afternoon, or a dance party after work. Anxiety dropped because I felt more able to show up and focus and I built more trust that I would show up and do what was needed.
Give yourself permission to walk away from the desk or scroll TikTok for 15 minutes guilt-free (on purpose!). Ironically, planned downtime often leads to more consistent work. Research does indicate that being off of your screen during that break will give you more of a cognitive boost, and movement works like a tiny adderall.
I encourage clients to plan some fun movement breaks into their afternoon slump. This can be a great time to use a standing desk or walking set up if you have one. Movement during your tired time can wake you up without adding an extra cup of coffee (terrible for your anxiety tbh).
I also love a lay on the floor break scheduled after a block of back to back meetings.
5. Pair Boring Tasks With Dopamine Boosts
Our ADHD brains crave novelty and excitement. This means your brain wants things to be new, different, & have some variety. Anxiety spikes when we’re forced to do things that feel dull or endless. So sweeten the deal by pairing your dreaded task with a rewarding mini-break or fun treat.
The reward triggers a dopamine release, making your brain less likely to default to anxiety or avoidance. Ideally, we want you to have a list of things that feel like rewards that are not food or spending related. This helps ensure you aren’t creating emotional eating or spending patterns.
Create if-then plans: “If I work on this financial spreadsheet for 20 minutes, then I get a 5-minute break to bounce on my rebounder” Silly? Maybe. Effective? Absolutely.
Some tasks require a low key distraction. If I am doing monotonous or boring tasks, I do better if I pair it with something I enjoy. I might listen to a podcast I love while folding the damn clothes, or listen to music I really enjoy while doing my bookkeeping. If you have a task you’re avoiding, or know you regularly put off, try to see what you could pair it with to make it so your brain is willing to do the annoying thing because you are making it more enjoyable.
6. The Two-Minute Rule
Anxiety often comes from staring at a mile-long to-do list. The “two-minute rule” says if a task takes under two minutes (a quick email, filing a form, refilling the printer), do it immediately. (Admittedly, this rule goes out the window for me if I have a meeting in less than 2 minutes, but sometimes is better than never.)
Knocking out small tasks on the spot stops them from clogging up my mental queue. Less backlog = less anxiety.
If you can’t knock it out in the moment, add it to whatever repository you use to keep track of tasks. There are a million apps and tech options. You might love a paper list. You might have an app you add things to but rarely check. Whatever you will use, double down on that.
Block out a 15-minute “tiny task sprint” once or twice a day. Bust through tiny tasks that usually hound you all week. I use this to get through my client notes and follow up work after sessions. Once a day works for me, but experiment for yourself to find what you need most.
7. Move Your Body—Yes, Really
Even a quick movement break—like marching in place or dancing to one song—burns anxious energy. Research shows it boosts dopamine and serotonin, both crucial for ADHD minds. Research also shows both children and adults are better able to focus and access executive function after a movement break.
I hate hearing “exercise is the fix,” but if I do a 1-minute shake out of my entire body in my living room when I’m spiraling, I sweat out some panic and come back clearer. That’s probably why every animal on earth does this regularly to reset their nervous systems. Silly humans and our societal norms.
Set a timer every 60–90 minutes. Stretch, do jumping jacks, go get yourself some water, head to the bathroom, do some stairs, or walk around. You’d be amazed how quickly this breaks up anxiety-laden tension, which tons of ADHDers are plagued with. (How’s your neck and upper back feeling, btw?)
You could do a tense and release moment during your movement break if you want. Try it now. Tense every muscle in your body, make fists, squeeze your muscles, get as tight and contracted as humanly posslbe and then………… release all that tension. If I tell you to relax you’ll probably get tighter, but this trick tends to work wonders for adults with ADHD and helps lower your stress levels.
8. Set a Crappy First Draft Goal (Because Perfect is a white supremacist Myth)
Perfectionism and anxiety are BFFs. Waiting for the “perfect” moment or the “perfect” draft just amplifies dread. Real talk? Trying something and “failing fast” is better than not trying at all.
Every time you take action (even messy action), you prove you can move forward. That kills anxiety’s power & builds your self esteem.
Adopt an experimental mindset. If you’re anxious about starting a project, commit to doing it for a single day, or working on it for 5 minutes. You’ll either learn something or see progress—but you won’t sit in dread limbo.
Starting is usually the hardest part, so make it as easy as humanly possible. What’s the smallest step you can take? Is there an easy win you can start with? For most once they have gotten 5 minutes into the project they were avoiding, their anxiety is lowered and it feels easy to continue on for a bit longer.
9. Check Sleep & Nutrition
Look, I’m rolling my eyes too. But if you’re running on 4 hours of sleep and living off caffeine, your ADHD brain is more prone to meltdown mode and your gut might try to kill you for this later.
Sleep helps you have access to more executive functioning skills.
Keeping a consistent-ish bedtime and not guzzling coffee past 2 PM could drastically cut your morning anxiety. And let’s be real: a bit of protein for breakfast can help keep you level as the day goes on. ADHD brains especially need the protein boost to set them up for success in their days.
Shift your bedtime earlier by just 15 minutes a night until it is at a time you feel good about. That micro-change can add up big time in anxiety reduction.
You might also want to try a mindfulness practice like Yoga Nidra. Many ADHD folks have busy minds that have a hard time slowing down. Give your brain something to focus on (relaxing each part of your body one at a time) so it’s not going over that thing someone said to you in 5th grade, again, until 3 am.
10. Lean on Actual Support
Anxiety thrives in isolation. Having someone who “gets it” can flip your day from meltdown to manageable. Do you have a loved one who can remind you to take a deep breath or find 5 blue things in the space around you?
Accountability buddies, coaches, or supportive communities can spot your blind spots and help you back on track before you’ve lost a whole week to avoidance.
Find one reliable partner or coach who checks in daily or weekly. That simple, “What’s your top task today?” might be all you need to bust through anxiety-laden avoidance and start problem solving and finding your way forward.
Check out this blog to get more ideas on how to actually stick to and implement any of the stress relief habits you want to try.
Tired of Anxious Overwhelm? Here’s Your Next Step
You’ve read about ADHD and anxiety. You’ve probably tried a ton of free tips, apps, or planners. But if you’re still in that cycle of underperforming, overthinking, and feeling behind, you’re not dealing with a knowledge gap—you’re dealing with an implementation gap.
Introducing The ADHD Dream Goal Accelerator
A 3-month private coaching program for ADHD professionals who:
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Know what to do but can’t make themselves do it consistently.
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Feel the pressure of big goals and big anxiety but keep stalling or burning out.
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Realize they’re done hoarding info and are finally ready to fix the root cause.
Why This Accelerator Is Essential (Not Just “Nice to Have”)
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Tailored to ADHD Reality: We address the specific meltdown points that derail you, so you stop repeating the same patterns.
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Daily Check-Ins: Relying on motivation alone never works. Having me in your corner, with judgement free nudging and troubleshooting in real time, does.
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Focus on Execution: This isn’t about more tips. It’s about bridging the gap between “I know exactly what to do” and “I actually followed through.”
You’ll get custom strategies that align with your ADHD brain, real-time pivots when you slip off track, and accountability that sticks—so you don’t lose days (or weeks) to procrastination and anxiety spirals.
Ready to Stop Consuming and Start Committing?
If you’re sick of reading post after post, saving it for “later,” and never seeing real change, the ADHD Dream Goal Accelerator is your next move. Because you don’t need more ideas to “try.” You need actual guidance that ensures you succeed—even on your toughest ADHD days.
Click here or email me at coach@lissydonovan.com to learn more or apply. Let’s turn your anxious cycles into consistent action—and finally see the results you’re capable of. You’ve got the vision. I’ve got the compassionate execution plan. Let’s make it happen, together.
Disclaimer: I’m a coach with lived ADHD experience, who works with lots of ADHD clients. I am not a medical professional. These tips are based on personal experience plus research. I have done training on anxiety and Neuroscience, however I am not a clinician and am not offering anyone any diagnosis. Always consult a qualified mental health professional for individual needs.