How to Stop Feeling Guilty and Recover from Burnout (Neurodivergent friendly!)

Have you ever felt so mentally and physically drained that starting any task felt nearly impossible?

For many neurodivergent individuals (ADHD, Autistic, Dyslexia, etc.), burnout can be especially severe—sometimes resembling the recovery from a mild brain injury. Burnout depletes your mental resources, disrupts your executive functioning, and can last weeks, months, and sometimes years. Combine that with procrastination, and you get a loop that can feel endless.

But here’s the hopeful part: understanding why this cycle happens is the first step in breaking it.

How Burnout Fuels Procrastination (Especially in Neurodivergent Brains)

Burnout doesn’t appear out of nowhere. Often it’s the result of prolonged stress, masking (trying to ‘fit in’ to neurotypical standards), sensory overload, pushing past your limits regularly for extended periods of time, massive stress, or constant demands on executive functioning. Here’s how it ties to procrastination:

1. Avoiding or “Freezing” on Meaningful Tasks 🧊

   • When you’re burned out, it’s common (& helpful!) to go into “shutdown” mode. Tasks—even those you care about—feel insurmountable. This shutdown can mirror how the brain recovers from an injury: it needs extra rest and reduced cognitive load.
     Do whatever you can to help reduce this load: ask friends to organize a meal train, let someone take over planning for a portion of your life, and give yourself plenty of time to do nothing but decompress and stare at the wall. 

2. Constant Distractions & Sensory-Seeking Behaviors 📱

   • You might find yourself scrolling endlessly or binge-watching because your brain is unconsciously searching for dopamine or trying to avoid further stress. This is even more common in ADHD, where the brain craves stimulation yet avoids tasks that feel too heavy. Be warned: constant scrolling actually demands a lot of our brain to constantly switch context, and binging shows for a whole day usually leave us more exhausted than we started out. You may want to lock your phone in another room when you're feeling drained and wanting to scroll, to make it a more doable prospect when you literally do not have access to constant willpower.

3. Losing Interest or Experiencing Executive Dysfunction 🎯

   • Burnout can make your usual ambitions feel pointless. When executive functions are compromised (like planning, working memory, or emotional regulation), procrastination becomes more of a neurological default than a simple “bad habit.” 
     Plan for this! Instead of letting this surprise you every time, make a plan when you are doing well for how you want to handle this next time you start getting into the burnout zone. Come up with menus of:

     • activation activities that help energize you and prepare you to get started focusing on a task

     • re-engagment tasks that help you get refocused for when you find your mind wandering during a task

     • Review tasks that help you evaluate and reassess so next time can be a little bit easier.
       
       
     • Restorative Actions you can take to help you feel more filled after your work or tasks.
       

Imagine waking up determined to tackle your to-do list. Instead, you find yourself scrolling social media, feeling too overwhelmed to start even the simplest task. You're on the couch, but definitely feeling stressed thinking about all the other things you could be doing.

By nighttime, you’ve made no progress, and the guilt cycle sets in. All that time you spend feeling guilty for not doing your tasks is actually a massive energy drain - you are getting zero rest on a day like this.

Ideally, we want you to break this cycle of guilt, change your plans to accommodate the brain weather you’re experiencing that day, and find small things you can do throughout the day to help you feel good and find a sense of accomplishment in your day. 

How to Stop Feeling Guilty

Whenever you find yourself thinking about your to do list or guilt over taking time to rest, we want you to give yourself a pre-determined reminder that feels more helpful. This is how you break your guilt habit. Over and over, every time you catch a guilty thought in your mind, or notice a should in your thinking, I want you to give yourself this reminder.

So, right now, you get to pick what that reminder will be.

What would be a helpful, reassuring thing you want to think instead of a guilty thought?

Here are some options to get your brain juices flowing:

• It is ok for me to rest.

• Research shows that rest fuels productivity.

• The things I need to do will wait for me.

• I will get to that another time.

• This is my time to rest, I do not need to be doing anything else right now.

• It is ok for me to prioritize recovery.

• It is great that I am working to meet my own needs.

Please feel free to make up your own sentence, or take bits and pieces and put together the one that feels most right for you.

What sentence will you use the next time the part of you that’s used to feeling guilty shows up and tries to hijack your rest time? Email me at coach@lissydonovan.com to boost your odds of actually using it.

How will you help yourself remember this redirect the next time guilty thinking pops up? Making a plan for how you can help yourself remember, or what reminders you will use to make this easier on you makes you way more likely to be successful. You might want to set an alarm in your phone for a time you usually feel guilty while resting, or put a visual reminder like a post it with your helpful sentence somewhere you will see it daily, like your bathroom.

Every time you have a guilty thought, you have the chance to break this habit of shoulding all over yourself. Every time you redirect yourself to your helpful, reassuring reminder you have now chosen for yourself, you are building a new habit that can one day replace your guilty habit.

Imagine if you reassured yourself every time you were shaming yourself for resting? You can literally make that your reality by consciously offering yourself that reassuring reminder every time the guilty parts take over. This isn't my opinion, its a proven strategy thanks to neuroscience.

So remember: keep giving yourself reassuring reminders instead of indulging in the shame, guilt, and watch your energy feel a bit restored. Schedule your breaks or set a few alarms to pull you out of hyperfocus. Make sure you have time for meals on your schedule!

Breaking the Burnout-Procrastination Cycle

Recovery from burnout can be a longer, more delicate process for some of us, but it’s absolutely possible. Here are steps to help you heal and regain momentum:

1. Prioritize Rest and Guilt-Free Downtime 🛌(guilt free is the important part here)

Neurodivergent burnout can mirror some aspects of post-concussion syndrome—your brain needs genuine rest to recover from prolonged stress or masking.

 

How to Do It:

• • Schedule micro-breaks throughout the day; even 5-10 minutes of planned downtime can be transformative. I literally lay on the floor between clients some days. 

  • Invest in quality sleep—8-10 hours if possible.

  • Create a “low stimulation” environment for at least part of your day (dim lights, minimal sound or soothing music, comfortable clothing) to help your brain reset. 

  • ADHDers may need to create a high stimulation environment at times, Put on the galaxy light, grab your headphones and turn up the dance jams, or lay on an acupressure mat to give your body relaxing or enjoyable stimulation when that’s what would help you rest, eventually.

My personal favorite low stimulation set up is to keep my bedroom very dark with electric candles going, and listening to yoga nidra or self hypnosis recordings to help me relax while I lay under a weighted blanket (or hopefully, a cat).

Experiment with different things in your environment to find what helps you relax the most fully.

2. Use Micro-Actions to Rebuild Momentum ⚙️

Executive functioning can be severely compromised during burnout. Breaking tasks into smaller chunks makes them more approachable.

 

How to Do It:

• • Identify the tiniest next step. (I know AI is horrendous for the environment, and I also know there are AI designed to do just this. So if your brain has melted and you just can’t break things down, google that and let the robot do it for you.)
    For example, if you need to write a proposal, your first step might be “open a new document.” Then, “write an outline” and maybe, “write the first paragraph” to, “write a bad first draft”. 

  • Reward yourself or celebrate after each micro-action to reinforce positive dopamine feedback. Rewards help you create habits more quickly and easily, so feel free to lavish in the celebration & play (which also speeds up learning) to make your life easier. 

  • Set a goal to do something for 5 minutes. After 5 minutes, you can either keep going, or be done knowing you hit the goal you set out for yourself. For many of us, getting started is the hardest part. 

If 5 minutes feels too long, try 2-minute work sessions. Gradually increase as your stamina allows.

Lower the bar until it starts happening, and then you can build the habit from there.

3. Reassess and Simplify Your Priorities 📝

Many neurodivergent people take on extra responsibilities (sometimes to prove capability or “keep up”), leading to overload.

 

How to Do It:

• • Make a list of absolute must-do tasks, and another list of tasks you can postpone or delegate. Remember, in burnout, most things are not must do. Enjoyable rest needs to be on your must do list. 

  • Use the “3 Most Important Tasks (MITs)” method daily. This helps anchor your focus on what truly matters. If you are in an intense burnout already, start with 2 most important task and build up slowly from there.
    In the mornings, set a reminder to ask yourself what 1-3 things would have the biggest positive impact on you or your life & work if you were to get them done?

  • Ask for support—whether it’s from coworkers, family, friends, or a coach - whatever you can access. Overcoming burnout often requires a collaborative approach. Research shows spending time with people you feel fully safe to be yourself with actually helps burnout recovery. 

Homework: Make a note in your phone, or a section in your journal with the heading: I am getting wins all the time! At the end of each day, jot down 3 wins (even if they feel tiny!). All of our brains are wired to notice the negative way more than the positive, this practice helps train your brain to get better at noticing the good things that are happening. This helps your brain register progress and positivity. 

Go set a reminder in your phone to do this at the end of your day ever day this week now. Try it out as an experiment and decide next week if you’d like to continue. 

You’re Not Alone

Burnout and procrastination can make you feel isolated, and many of us can retract from our relationships when experiencing burnout, but it’s important to remember that nothing lasts forever. You are in a moment of contraction, but every single thing in the entire universe is always either expanding or contracting. Your expansion will come. Your healing will happen if you commit to changing your thinking and creating more daily rest, nervous system support, & recovery for yourself. 

Support is out there if doing this alone feels daunting or overwhelming. You can outsource the thinking to a professional and speed up your recovery time by having a clear action plan that feels easy to implement. 

Triumph ADHD Coaching provides real-time strategies tailored for neurodivergent minds, helping you recover and thrive again.

Ready to make a change?

• Schedule an SOS coaching session for a live call and leave feeling relieved, with immediate support and actionable steps you know how you can follow.
• Join Triumph to build a long-term, sustainable recovery plan and regain your energy, focus, and motivation. Get daily check ins from your clarity coach to outsource the executive function of creating a new habit to an expert, and make sure you stay on track with your recovery so you get better, faster. 

Let’s break the cycle—together. 

I have lived experience of recovering from neurodivergent burnout many times over my 38 years. Some of my burnouts have come with major skill loss and regression. I know how hard it is to navigate through while your brain isn’t working with you. I would be so honored to help you get through that faster and easier so you can get back to feeling like yourself again.